Lately, it seems like I’ve been hearing from more people who are going through tough times.
Adversity is a part of life; we all know this. But it does feel like there is a lot more chaos and uncertainty in the world today. Chaos and uncertainty create anxiety, stress, and negativity, which only makes things worse.
I’ve been asked how I recommend dealing with those tough times when it feels like everything is going wrong.
Here is my answer.
1) Know you’re not alone.
When adversity strikes, it can feel like you’re the only person dealing with trouble at the moment. It can feel like everyone other than you has life all figured out.
This is simply not true.
Nobody goes through life undefeated. It doesn’t matter how positive, disciplined, hard-working, smart, wealthy, or healthy you are, you can’t avoid setbacks.
That’s not being negative. That’s acknowledging reality.
It’s how you respond to an inevitable setback that determines your eventual outcome.
Don’t beat yourself up with feelings of self-pity or guilt just because you’re going through tough times. Know that you’re not alone. Everyone must deal with difficult seasons in life.
2) Read something positive.
Reading and re-reading motivational books have gotten me through some of my most difficult times.
This is the scene where Bear Bryant teaches Coach McNeely about the importance of perseverance and mental toughness in times of adversity. I personally go back to this chapter often and re-read it when I’m struggling with a setback.
It always gives me an extra boost to keep fighting for my dreams and moving forward despite whatever setback I’m dealing with.
3) Remind yourself that tough times never last.
Problems come and go. Whatever problem you’re facing now, it will eventually pass.
I also try to remind myself that when things do eventually get better, I’ll probably look back and regret that I let myself get stressed out when I was dealing with the problem.
Problems aren’t pleasant, but they are temporary. Don’t make things worse by forgetting this fact.
4) Watch something that lightens you up.
Big problems and defeats can feel all-consuming. You can find yourself so consumed by the problem that you’re not thinking about anything else.
It’s exhausting.
The best way to give yourself some mental relief is to take some time in the evening and force yourself to watch something lighthearted. Ideally, something that makes you laugh.
Laughter is one of the best stress-relievers available.
Yet, when times are tough and we most need a laugh, it’s easy to feel guilty about watching something lighthearted—as though it’s irresponsible to “waste” your time doing something joyful when you’ve got this big problem to deal with.
Don’t fall for that line of thinking. Allow yourself to lighten up and not take yourself—and life—so seriously.
5) Check in on someone else.
One of the fastest ways to feel better about whatever difficulty you’re facing is to stop thinking about your life for a moment and ask someone else about theirs.
This isn’t easy to do. When times are tough, it can feel like your energy is depleted and you barely have the mental capacity to deal with your own life, let alone someone else’s.
But trust me, this works.
Remember, everyone must deal with adversity and someone you know may be quietly going through a very hard time right now.
Take a moment to call or text a friend or family member and ask how they are doing. Let them know you’re there for them if they need anything. And if they take you up on your offer, all the better.
It sounds counterintuitive, but it’s amazing how quickly helping someone else with their problem (or simply reaching out to them and asking how they are doing) will alleviate your own problems.
Those are my five go-to recommendations for dealing with tough times.
If you’re a spiritual person, I would add praying to this list. Letting go and trusting God to help you with a problem can be a huge stress-reliever. It can also open you up to new ideas and solutions you may not have thought of.
If you’re going through tough times, I hope these quick recommendations help you the way they have helped me.
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